Why don’t we put our affairs in order?

Putting our affairs in order is NOT exactly what anyone really wants to do now, is it? People don’t spring out of bed in the morning excited and jubilant to have the opportunity to prepare for their demise. It’s just not an activity that we relish and find delight in doing.

So, we put it off.

Again and again, we shrug our shoulders, and shake our heads, roll our eyes and we decide, LATER. We’ll do it later. Yep. That feels better.

And off to the races we go, ignoring the one thing in life that is sure to happen. 

Temporarily, we feel a bit of relief as we have pushed the dread aside and gotten on with the business of living. 

But, there seems to be this little nag, this tiny little grind within us, this small feeling that we really should think about this and do something.

Yet, the reality of the overwhelming nature of this chore keeps us away from considering it. 

There is so much involved in planning for this part of our future and it is disheartening. Swirling questions bog us down and squander our mental capital, and confusion clutters our thinking. 

Naturally, the cost of an attorney is highest on our list of concerns. Then follows the unknown amount of information that we need to gather in order to see said attorney. Setting an appointment seems impossible because we don’t know what we don’t know and how long it will take us to find out; we don't want to waste any time talking with a very expensive attorney.

Money, money, money, money…..it’s such a huge part of our hesitation to move forward with this. We can just barely pay our monthly bills, how on earth can we afford two thousand dollars of attorney fees?

The next hurdle that people with children face after the cost considerations, is now the looming impossible decision of who will take care of our children?

This is the hardest of all decisions, because, really, who will love your child like you love your child? Who will listen to their heart and who will nurture them as you want them to be cared for? 

This is the one main roadblock that prevents parents from accomplishing this task. They feel that there is really no one that can measure up to raise their child the way they want it done. 

So the decision remains unmade.

Let’s think about this for a minute. We have all heard the horror stories of children who have no designated caregivers and they fall into the hands of really bad people. It breaks our hearts to hear it, yet we never think it could happen to our kids. 

Why do we put our children and our assets in jeopardy when we can do something to protect them?

• We are too busy
• We are confused
• We fear this will take too much time to learn
• We can’t find anyone good enough
• We don’t have enough money
• We want to do this but our spouses don’t
• We don’t trust our partner to handle this

But, when it gets right down to it though, perhaps consider that the real deep down reason, really, is simply, fear. We fear the end of our lives and we fear that we will get this wrong, so we avoid it all together. 

So, what would happen if you were to stop right here for a minute and really dig down and decide what it is that is stopping you? 

Identifying the problem is the first step towards solving that problem. Once you know what is wrong, now you can get about the business of fixing it.

Maybe you need a little bit of education, you need a bit of context before jumping into a field about which you know absolutely nothing. 

Maybe you need a quick solution, just get it done without wasting your valuable time.

Or, you just need to find the right person to fill your shoes in your absence.

It helps to find out what it is that you want and need in order to accomplish this.

The next thing to understand is important: YOU ARE NOT ALONE AND YOU ARE NOT BAD for not having done this yet. 

You are not the only person who has put this off. Two out of three people refuse to do this! You are like most people!

Additionally, not having completed getting your affairs in order doesn’t make you a bad person: you’re probably a really good person, but you just can’t decide what to do!

So, take away the guilt, and take away the overwhelm, and understand that this is something that you can do and you can do it quickly at that!

It’s just a matter of deciding. 

Take the leap. Make the choice. Decide that you can tangibly love your family and protect them, even if it feels uncomfortable to you right now. The feelings of relief and joy for completing a difficult task will far outweigh the feelings that have stopped you so far.

If you jump in with both feet and get this moving, you will be so glad that you did!